The Evolution of Mara Dyer

This book was a lot more 'Ohhh my wordd I love Noah!' Like, he's everything. But not in a silly way, he stands by Mara and it means the world. He is her rock, they trust each other. I like their relationship a lot, because it never seems too-soon or co-dependent, and it never seems teen-dramatic, even though it so easily could be. Michelle created them so perfectly, as individuals and for each other. And somehow she never loses that passion and chemistry between them. I might say it was even a little sexy..

This story, gahhh I loved it even more than the first book. It's.. Thrilling! And captivating. It's filled with twists and turns and chapters that end with me holding my breath (sometimes because I hope she gets to kiss Noah, and sometimes because MAJOR PLOT TWIST that I most definitely did not see coming.)

Michelle Hodkins takes you on this journey where, again you don't know whether Mara is actually getting more delusional or if her circumstance really is getting more twisted. It's exciting mostly because everything we read unfolds as Mara sees it and she is so lost and confused while she puts the pieces together. It's a beautiful story of trust and deception and passion and desperation. And mmm I do love the tragedy, the reality of psychiatric care and the supernatural aspects that Michelle so finely weaves into the book. I'd want to call it a psycho-thriller. Yeah. Is that a genre? That's what it is!

I'm being vague about the plot on purpose, because watching it unfold is most of the fun. It reminded me of The Lovely Bones every now and then, just because of how frightened I was sometimes. And again, felt like Gone Girl, with the second-guessing and not-knowing. She has flashbacks that were fields and carriages and rituals and old languages, that remind me of Reign. But also, and especially near the end, it felt a little like Dollhouse, or Catching Fire, where you begin to think someone is messing with her but you just can't figure out who or why or in which parts.. IT'S THE BEST!

The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer

(Fun intro fact: This started off intriguing and then it just got way too.. accurately PTSD for me. It was too close to home and too realistic for me to continue, and so I stopped reading it for a while. When I came back to it, I was so happy I did! I found the accurate portrayal to be beautiful and true and, an important part of understanding what Mara is going through.)

This book is thrilling and fun, there's a gorgeous British bad-boy-with-more-going-on-than-everyone-else-sees (how can you not love) and there's a complicated situation that Mara is trying to figure out. It was kinda cool that I had just finished Gone Girl, and started reading Stephen King's 'Carrie' at the same time as this one, because it's got aspects of both.

-You have no idea what's real and what's not, and there's an important and urgent mystery to be solved while making sure that, to the prying eyes and public, you look like everything is fine. And then, there's this potential supernatural aspect that you're wondering about while Mara discovers more of the real story and wonders deeper into what's been happening since the accident.

There's a moment, about three-quarters into the book where it's like 'Um, really Michelle? Unneccesary. Aligators, really? Why you gotta do me like dis.' BUT THEN IT ALL MAKES SENSE AND IT'S AMAZING. Seriously, just keep reading. All the twists that may have felt annoying with other characters or in another book, just WORKS in this one. So well! Cassie Clare is right, it is haunting and dreamlike.

This book was fun to read, a true adventure of love and fear and "whattt is happening?!" In her acknowledgments, Michelle Hodkin thanks some of my favourite authors for their support (*fangirls a little.. keeps reading*) and then ends with 'I can't wait to share what happens next' and I WAS LIKE BUT I NEED TO KNOW NOW MICHELLE! I'm lucky it's already out, I rushed to get the second one immediately, it's that good.

Where Rainbows End (Love, Rosie)

I found this book in my favourite second-hand bookstore. It was a soft and well-loved book, with that sweet smell of old book, mmm. Its pretty cover and romantic storyline meant I couldn't leave without taking it home with me. And I'm so happy I did, it's the sweetest! **I later found out it's also being made into a movie, so while I was reading it, two of the actors I've been obsessed with recently were filming the story! Which yes, gave me even more feels!

The story is long, but in a comforting way. It's filled with all kinds of love, over years and through different lives. It's filled with sweet moments and difficult choices and that always-hopeful belief that Rosie and Alex are meant for eachother. It's the kind of story that you get lost in, and never really want to leave. I giggled at the emails they send and the children as they grow up, and Iawhhhed and noooo-ed and, so many feelings. I marked so many pages that were just, perfect butterfly moments.

Mostly, it's the kind of story I know I'll read many times over the years, because I'll see different things every time. There's everything from childhood crushes and teenage could-we-last-forevers, to there's 'she's engaged, I missed my chance' and all the hardships of marriage. The story tells of the magic and hope that friendship can be, and of the beauty that a shared life can be.

Here's a picture from the movie set, I love it. 

Three quotes I loved: 
“I've learned that home isn't a place, it’s a feeling.”

“Our life is made up of time; our days are measured in hours, our pay measured by those hours, our knowledge is measured by years. We grab a few quick minutes in our busy day to have a coffee break. We rush back to our desks, we watch the clock, we live by appointments. And yet your time eventually runs out and you wonder in your heart of hearts if those seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years and decades were being spent the best way they possibly could. In other words, if you could change anything, would you?” 

“You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you’re doing, where you are, who you’re with, and if you’re OK. You need someone who can help you reach your dreams and protect you from your fears. You need someone who will treat you with respect, love every part of you, especially your flaws. You should be with someone who could make you happy, really happy, dancing on air happy.” 

And the movie poster: 

Eleanor & Park

In the book, Park says “Eleanor was right. She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something.” and my goodness does this book make you feel SO MANY THINGS!

Rainbow (I loved her a thousand times before even reading this, for her name) wrote this like an art piece. It's rough and moody, honest and captivating, sweet and filled with deep love, and its colours fill every little piece of your heart.

I love that it's set in the 80s. I love the song lyrics and band names, the cassette tapes and the landline phones. I love that Eleanor and Park are broken in their own delicate way, but that neither tries to change or redefine the other. Their love is a 'let me learn you, I want all of you' kind of thing. And it never feels like they're trying to fix each other, because they don't see any part of the other as broken.

I thought this was going to be another cute love story set in a difficult-to-be-together situation, but it was nothing like I could ever imagine. The way Rainbow writes Eleanor's home life and internal thoughts, is more intimately realistic than my heart could take.

And while this book is filled with the heartbreaking, harsh realities of life, it is also filled with thousands of tiny adorable moments of discovered love. Wildly vivid descriptions of moments shared, and observations about each other that sound like whispers. They're entranced by each other. I love that she smells like vanilla, and the way she is one of the kids and set apart from them at the same time but loves them completely. I love the role that Park's parents and their past plays into Park and Eleanor's relationship and future.

I really feel like I'm playing down the cuteness of the couple, but oh gosh you need to know they're adorable! Their story is filled with giggles and electric touches, and kisses that they never want to end. Their conversations are filled with life, strong opinions, song lyrics and love for other worlds. It's a sweet, sweet strong love that will make your heart sing, and you'll find yourself giggling into the book cover.

Eleanor and Park are in high school, and share a brief time together, but the love feels real, and mature and heavy in a way that can only make you feel light. Dealing with obstacles simply by being there for each other and in each other's hearts.

Wow, I think I have said 'each other' a million times here. Just, read the book. Like I will, a hundred more times this year and for many years to come. It's a book that leaves you with the feeling that you just read something incredibly important. It doesn't feel like just a story, it feels like you lived through something courageous and hopeful.

I love the way John Green ends his review of this book (I just found it while looking at fan art of the story) and so I will end mine with his words:

Early in the novel, Park’s English teacher asks him why “Romeo and Juliet” has survived 400 years. With Eleanor looking on, Park says: “Because people want to remember what it’s like to be young? And in love?” After a moment, he adds, “Is that right?”

It is. “Eleanor & Park” reminded me not just what it’s like to be young and in love with a girl, but also what it’s like to be young and in love with a book.

If I ever get to meet Rainbow, I'd want to give her a hug, and a very simple, sincere 'Thank you.' for sending a gift this beautiful, with so much heart, into the world.

Gone Girl

I started reading this book after seeing Lea Michele was yet another celeb to be reading it, and ohhh myyy it's been a thrill! It's trippy in the loveliest way; it keeps you guessing! It's filled with the sweetness of first marriage and growing as a couple. It's also twisted and dark and captivating. 

The book starts with so many cute little moments about the start of their love story, and the way Nick and Amy began their marriage. The mood of the book is such (and this is what I kept telling people about the book) that you literally have no idea who to trust and what is actually happening. I loved that!

And then you start getting both perspectives, and just when you think you're figuring it all out, the chapter ends with another jaw-dropping moment that changes everything! I think it's best if you don't read up on the plot, it's such a fun adventure watching it fall out in front of you.

The second part of the book is all sociopath-paranoia-plotting, it's magnificent and terrifying! I spent most of this last part, panicked about what I would do if I was in Nick's situation, and hoping with everything in me that someone is on his side. I was of course, completed entranced by Amy's every thought and wondering what her every move would be. 

Up until the very end of the book, you have no idea how things are going to play out. It's complicated and beautiful and fascinating and overflowing with human realities: of society and prejudice and manipulation and personality weakness.

Reading this book was like watching a couple balancing on a tightrope, at a big show with a million distractions. It's only really about their dynamic, but they have somehow involved all these other people's opinions and desires and.. It's messy and they fight dirty, but it's all so controlled, so planned. You'll know what I mean when you read it! (Read it!) 

and just like I said at the end of Follow Me Down, if you've read it I would love to discuss the ending. 

Golden

This is a lovely book! A wonderful weekend read!

'Seventeen-year-old Parker Frost has never taken the road less traveled. Valedictorian and quintessential good girl, she’s about to graduate high school without ever having kissed her crush or broken the rules. So when fate drops a clue in her lap—one that might be the key to unraveling a town mystery—she decides to take a chance.'

It's filled with beautiful imagery, so much emotion, fills your heart with the winds of change and challenges to really live. I especially loved the journal aspect, and the beautiful way it's written. Every chapter starts with a floral illustration, and a line from a poem or a poignant quote. I really liked that. 

The first line I highlighted in the book is this: "Today the wind and I burst through the double doors together, and it carries me like someone who's going places, because now it's official. I am." and the book kind of carries you on a journey with this feeling. It's a book about really living, and enjoying the experiences while you chase your goals. "A life made of beauty and love and chance." It asks the question, "What will you live for? Be passionate about? Define yourself by?" while you read Parker's story, as she reads Julianna's story and tries to live them both out as best she can. 

Julianna writes so beautifully of a boy who 'feels like someone I've always known, but also someone I need to know more' and it changes the way she sees her life and her relationship and, the course of her life in it's entirety. 

I believe that every moment matters and happens for a reason, that you see things in conversations or the corner of your eyes and that one day it all matches up to have a magnificent meaning. And I enjoyed that aspect, but I also enjoyed the way *not really a spoiler* it ends with possibility, no defined answer or 'happily ever after' - though to me, that's the real kind of happily ever after.

I think this would make a great movie adaption, or even tv series. And I'd kind of like a second book, maybe written the way Lola and the Boy Next Door is.. where you see them again but in a different story. Maybe from someone like Orion's perspective, or Hope's thoughts. 

There's a boy who has like Parker for years, Be a miracle. Be alive, and living a beautiful life somewhere new, however impossible it seems.

The Spectacular Now

This book was a wonderful weekend read. It's as lush and sunlight-filled as the movie posters for the film adaption are. It's sweet and sincere; also real-life messy, honest, unpredictable and entertaining. A lovely coming-of-age story about a boy who sees the world as it is, and embraces the weird.

I loved Sutter from the very beginning, for his incredibly vast and genuinely kind insights into the hearts of those around him. He's so very aware, of his impact on their worlds, which can often be complicated but to him reality is a simple truth. 

It's a story that made me wonder if I am doing everything I can to be as alive as I can be in this moment. It made me realise that things can seem messy but, with the right person and the right perspective (and maybe a shot of Whiskey) the world is a bright adventure waiting to be had. 

Sutter changes Aimee's life, and she changes his. -For the simple reason that their hearts are open, to change and light and opportunity. We learn about different kinds of love and the effects of heartache. But also of sacrifice and the wonder in how transient relationships can be.